The Ultimate Rejection Letter
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Herbert A. Millington
Chair - Search Committee
412A Clarkson Hall, Whitson University
College Hill, MA 34109
Dear Professor Millington,
Thank you for your letter of March 16. After careful consideration, I
regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me
an assistant professor position in your department.
This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually
large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field
of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.
Despite Whitson's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in
rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at
this time. Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant professor
in your department this August. I look forward to seeing you then.
Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.
Sincerely,
Chris L. Jensen
Chair - Search Committee
412A Clarkson Hall, Whitson University
College Hill, MA 34109
Dear Professor Millington,
Thank you for your letter of March 16. After careful consideration, I
regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me
an assistant professor position in your department.
This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually
large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field
of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.
Despite Whitson's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in
rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at
this time. Therefore, I will assume the position of assistant professor
in your department this August. I look forward to seeing you then.
Best of luck in rejecting future applicants.
Sincerely,
Chris L. Jensen
Biggest PJ Ever
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
One day a man comes out of the Bank and hires an Auto for his home.
The auto-driver charged him 100 rs, which is far far larger than the
actual charge, that is 10 rs. The man doesn't know the actual charge and
paid the money.
Now, the mystry begins from the very next morning when the man
awakes.
Suddenly he feels that it's still dark outside and the sun hasn't yet
shown its face. But soon he realise that it's not the case of sun but
he's
actually is not able to see. In short he's blind. He gets very
tensed doesn't know what to do. His entire day has passed with great
anxiety,proceeds, the man gradually starts regaining his eyesight
and he once again normal when it's completely dark out side. At this he is
completely confused and perplexed. He's very eager to know what's
the behind, but finds not a single proper reason for this.
, can you help him to find out the reason behind his sudden
blindness??
a bit
a bit more
socho socho
it's very simple
give one more try
hit your head on the wall
It's very simple
AUTOWALE NE US AADMI KO ULLU BANAYA THA, got it?
The auto-driver charged him 100 rs, which is far far larger than the
actual charge, that is 10 rs. The man doesn't know the actual charge and
paid the money.
Now, the mystry begins from the very next morning when the man
awakes.
Suddenly he feels that it's still dark outside and the sun hasn't yet
shown its face. But soon he realise that it's not the case of sun but
he's
actually is not able to see. In short he's blind. He gets very
tensed doesn't know what to do. His entire day has passed with great
anxiety,proceeds, the man gradually starts regaining his eyesight
and he once again normal when it's completely dark out side. At this he is
completely confused and perplexed. He's very eager to know what's
the behind, but finds not a single proper reason for this.
, can you help him to find out the reason behind his sudden
blindness??
a bit
a bit more
socho socho
it's very simple
give one more try
hit your head on the wall
It's very simple
AUTOWALE NE US AADMI KO ULLU BANAYA THA, got it?
Ten Dollars Is Ten Dollars
Fred and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year. Every year Fred would say, “Edna, I’d like to ride in that there airplane.” And every year Edna would say, “I know Fred, but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars.”
One year Fred and Edna went to the fair and Fred said, “Edna, I’m 71 years old. If I don’t ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance.” Edna replied, “Fred that there airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars.”
The pilot overheard them and said, “Folks, I’ll make you a deal. I’ll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won’t charge you, but if you say one word it’s ten dollars.”
Fred and Edna agreed and up they go. The pilot does all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard. He does all his tricks over again, but still not a word.
They land and the pilot turns to Fred, “By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn’t.”
Fred replied, “Well, I was going to say something when Edna fell out of the plane, but ten dollars is ten dollars.”
Funny Questions,Wierd Answers.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Top 10 stupid questions people usually ask in obvi
1. At the movies:
When you meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:- Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:- Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here...
2. In the bus:
A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question:- Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:- No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.. ...why don't you
try again.
3. At a funeral:
One of the teary-eyed people ask...
Stupid Question:- Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:- Why? Would it rather have been you?
4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is the "Butter Paneer Masala" good??
Answer:- No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We
occassionaly also spit in it.
5. At a family get-together:
When some distant aunt meets you after years
Stupid Question:-Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:- Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.
6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question:- Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:- No,he's a miserable wife-beating ,insensitive lout...it's just
the money.
7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
Stupid Question:- Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:- No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in
Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping.... you dumb witted
moron.
8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question:- Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:- No, its autumn and I'm shedding.... ..
9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
Stupid Question:- Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:- No it wont. It will just bleed.
10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman in your office
asks...
Stupid Question:- Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:- Gosh, it's a miracle ...........it was a piece of chalk and
now it's in flames!!!
Smart Students
President Bush went to a school to interact with the children. After having
one brief talk with the children he asked them if they had any question to
ask him.
One boy raised his hand and stood up;
Bush: whats your name
John: john
Bush: whats your question?
John: Sir, I have three questions
1) Why did America attack Iraq without the approval of UNO?
2) Where is osama?
3) Why does America support Pakistan so much?
Bush: you are an intelligent student John....(just then the bell for recess
rang)
Oh! Dear students we will continue after the recess is over.
After the recess
Bush: ok children where were we?
Yes, so anybody wants to ask any question?
Peter raises his hand
Bush :Whats your name?
Peter : Sir,I am Peter. I have 5 questions.
1) Why did America attack Iraq without the approval of UNO?
2) Where is osama?
3) Why do America support Pakistan so much?
4) Why did recess bell rang 20 mins before the scheduled time?
5) Where is JOHN?
one brief talk with the children he asked them if they had any question to
ask him.
One boy raised his hand and stood up;
Bush: whats your name
John: john
Bush: whats your question?
John: Sir, I have three questions
1) Why did America attack Iraq without the approval of UNO?
2) Where is osama?
3) Why does America support Pakistan so much?
Bush: you are an intelligent student John....(just then the bell for recess
rang)
Oh! Dear students we will continue after the recess is over.
After the recess
Bush: ok children where were we?
Yes, so anybody wants to ask any question?
Peter raises his hand
Bush :Whats your name?
Peter : Sir,I am Peter. I have 5 questions.
1) Why did America attack Iraq without the approval of UNO?
2) Where is osama?
3) Why do America support Pakistan so much?
4) Why did recess bell rang 20 mins before the scheduled time?
5) Where is JOHN?
12-things-your-cv-should-not-have
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Colorful or glossy paper and flashy fonts
Your CV is a formal, official document. Keep it simple.
~ Resume or CV at the top
Many people tend to add headings to their CV. The usual are CV, Curriculum Vitae and Resume. Do not do this.
~ Photographs until asked
Do not add your photo to the CV until you have been asked for it. Photographs are required only for certain types of positions like models, actors etc.
~ Usage of 'I', 'My', 'He', 'She'
Do not use these in your CV. Many candidates write, 'I worked as Team Leader for XYZ Company' or 'He was awarded Best Employee for the year 2007'. Instead use bullet points to list out your qualifications/ experience like: Team leader for XYZ Company from 2006-2007.
~ Spelling mistakes and grammatical errors
Proofread your CV until you are confident that it doesn't have any spelling mistakes or grammatical errors. These are big put-offs for the recruiters. Moreover, sometimes these mistakes might land you in an embarrassing situation.
A candidate who submitted his CV without proofreading it committed the mistake of wrongly spelling 'ask' as 'ass'. Now you can imagine the type of embarrassment he must have faced during the interview, when the interviewer pointed it out. These mistakes tend to convey a lazy and careless attitude to the interviewer.
~ Lies about your candidature
Do not lie about your past jobs or qualifications or anything which might have an impact on the job. You may be able to secure a job with these lies today but tomorrow you may lose it as well.
~ Abbreviations or jargon that is difficult to understand
People screening your resume usually belong to the HR department. If they do not understand what the abbreviations and jargon mean, they will simply dump your CV in the trash can. Avoid over-using such terms as far as possible.
~ Reasons for leaving last job
Leave these reasons to be discussed during the personal interview. For example, some candidates write: Reason for leaving the last job: Made redundant. Avoid making such statements in your CV, they add no value. Besides, if you do get an interview call, chances are the interviewer will address the issue.
~ Past failures or health problems
Mentioning these immediately slash your chances of getting an interview call.
For instance, you have a gap in your employment because you started your own business which did not do well. Some candidates might write -- Reason for gap in employment: Started own business which failed. Do not do this type of injustice with your job hunt at this stage of writing the CV.
~ Current or expected salary
Leave it to be discussed while negotiating the salary.
~ Irrelevant details
Leave out the details like marital status, sex, passport number, number of kids, age of kids. These are usually irrelevant for most interviewers but at times could be used as a basis for discrimination.
~ References
Do not include them until asked. In fact, it is not even required to mention the line 'Reference available on request'. If the recruiter requires a reference, he/she will ask you to bring it along for the interview.
Your CV is a formal, official document. Keep it simple.
~ Resume or CV at the top
Many people tend to add headings to their CV. The usual are CV, Curriculum Vitae and Resume. Do not do this.
~ Photographs until asked
Do not add your photo to the CV until you have been asked for it. Photographs are required only for certain types of positions like models, actors etc.
~ Usage of 'I', 'My', 'He', 'She'
Do not use these in your CV. Many candidates write, 'I worked as Team Leader for XYZ Company' or 'He was awarded Best Employee for the year 2007'. Instead use bullet points to list out your qualifications/ experience like: Team leader for XYZ Company from 2006-2007.
~ Spelling mistakes and grammatical errors
Proofread your CV until you are confident that it doesn't have any spelling mistakes or grammatical errors. These are big put-offs for the recruiters. Moreover, sometimes these mistakes might land you in an embarrassing situation.
A candidate who submitted his CV without proofreading it committed the mistake of wrongly spelling 'ask' as 'ass'. Now you can imagine the type of embarrassment he must have faced during the interview, when the interviewer pointed it out. These mistakes tend to convey a lazy and careless attitude to the interviewer.
~ Lies about your candidature
Do not lie about your past jobs or qualifications or anything which might have an impact on the job. You may be able to secure a job with these lies today but tomorrow you may lose it as well.
~ Abbreviations or jargon that is difficult to understand
People screening your resume usually belong to the HR department. If they do not understand what the abbreviations and jargon mean, they will simply dump your CV in the trash can. Avoid over-using such terms as far as possible.
~ Reasons for leaving last job
Leave these reasons to be discussed during the personal interview. For example, some candidates write: Reason for leaving the last job: Made redundant. Avoid making such statements in your CV, they add no value. Besides, if you do get an interview call, chances are the interviewer will address the issue.
~ Past failures or health problems
Mentioning these immediately slash your chances of getting an interview call.
For instance, you have a gap in your employment because you started your own business which did not do well. Some candidates might write -- Reason for gap in employment: Started own business which failed. Do not do this type of injustice with your job hunt at this stage of writing the CV.
~ Current or expected salary
Leave it to be discussed while negotiating the salary.
~ Irrelevant details
Leave out the details like marital status, sex, passport number, number of kids, age of kids. These are usually irrelevant for most interviewers but at times could be used as a basis for discrimination.
~ References
Do not include them until asked. In fact, it is not even required to mention the line 'Reference available on request'. If the recruiter requires a reference, he/she will ask you to bring it along for the interview.
Have A Look, Think Positive
Monday, March 17, 2008
If you think you have huge tension, look at them 
if you think your job is tough, how about him?
if you think your salary is low, how about her?
If you think you don't have many friends, ask yourself if you have one sincere friend
you think study is a burden, how about her?
when you feel like giving up, think of this man
if you think you suffer in life, do you suffer as much as he does?
if you complaint about your transport system, how about them?
if your society is unfair to you, how about her?
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