New words added to the English dictionary

Bucknor : (n) (adj)

1. Temporary blindness leading to missing out on the obvious.

2. To be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

3. Situations leading to grave judgmental errors.

Usage: I feel bucknored by my boss; Life often throws a bucknor at you.

Benson: (n) (adj)

1. Something that legitimises a severe bucknor.

Usage: First they bucknored me and then they bensoned it! I am toast.

Also see bucknor

Pontingity : [ pont in gi tee ]

possession of firm principles: the quality of possessing and steadfastly adhering to high moral principles or professional standards !!!

Usage: You cannot question my pontingity in the game.

Kumble: (1) Possession of strict adherence to the gentlemanly sport of cricket,

(2) extreme self-righteousness and pomposity

Eg. “Only one side was playing Kumble in this match”

& “India always plays Kumble because we are so Kumble.”

Harbhajan: The combined medical conditions of myopia and memory loss

Eg. “I thought he was a monkey not a man and I forgot that I had been told about this before. It’s not my fault, I have Harbhajan disease.

Tendulkar: to petulantly take your bat & ball and sulk your way home

Eg “Harbhajan is innocent and I suggest that if he is not cleared we do a tendulkar and get the f… out of here.”

Definitions of common Words

Atom Bomb: An invention made to end all inventions.

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.

Classic: A book which people praises, but do not read.

College: A place where some pursue learning and others learn pursuing.

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.

Criminal: A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.

Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.

Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually looks forward to the trip.

Divorce: Future tense of marriage.

Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

Father: A banker provided by nature.

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".

Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five-day test.

Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and woman gains her master.

Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."

Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

Pessimist: A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.

Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.

Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine waterpower.

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Funny Definitions

Beauty Parlor:
A place where women curl up and dye

Cannibal:
Someone who is fed up with people

Dust:
Mud with the juice squeezed out

Egotist:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation

Gossip:
A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage

Handkerchief:
Cold storage

Inflation:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper

Raisin:
Grape with a sunburn

Tomorrow:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today

Mosquito:
An insect that makes you like flies better

Yawn:
An honest opinion openly expressed

Secret:
Something you tell to one person at a time